@mazelabz
My friend once told me, “people don’t care how right you are if you’re not likable,” and that stuck with me
@fluid8888
Dr.K is really dialed in in this one. He is so insanely careful to keep the conversation moving forward to help Pirate understand while still keeping him secure enough to even be able to listen. It truely is an awe-inspiring watch. Having these types of conversations with friends and family in real life can be so difficult but nessesary at times and this is a masterclass in how to conduct such discussions.
@lj53004
I really appreciated this talk. In particular, that idea that you might be robbing someone of their ability to be upset at you by presenting a very logical, compassionate defense was really interesting for me. Wrestling with the internet aside, I definitely forget in my real life how important it is to validate someone's feelings in an argument as opposed to just trying to defend or explain myself.
@Soulessblur
Dr. K's ability to hit the nail on the head about how Pirate responded in the moment, DESPITE the fact that he never actually saw the clip of the wipe itself during this conversation, is amazing to me. Makes sense for a career in psychology to make you better at catching those tells, but it's still amazing to see in action him connect dots and reach a conclusion that I wholeheartedly agree with, but would have NEVER reached myself on the outside.
@TheLilLinguine
Life changing tool I'm going to take away from this conversation.. "What are you hearing me say to you right now?". It seems so simple.. but I was literally in awe of how effective that question was each time it was asked. Thinking about it actually helped me realize a flaw of my own, which is to assume how my information was received and try to clarify.. though that may lead me further away from how it WAS actually received. Instead of doing so, just ASK. Man.. that is amazing. As always, thank you Dr K!
@k9s2music65
Dude I love Dr K. What an amazing interview, and navigating around someone’s mind in an inoffensive way. Also, what Pirate did in having this interview on such an open forum, is incredibly difficult. People should commend him for that.
@danielh2869
I can't believe Dr K sussed out exactly what the issue was. The man can sense energy. Wow
@AdmiralSpaceAmoeba
2:10:00 is such a mindblowing realization of Thor's mental process, because I'm married to someone who basically believes the same thing, and it was a huge thorn in our relationship, because whenever she had to apologize about something, it was followed by a long spiel of an explanation/context and in the moment, especially if you feel like you were wronged, feels like making an excuse for your mistake. When from her perspective, she thought the extra context and detail was necessary for an apology. For an inverse, when I would apologize for something I did, I'd just say "I'm sorry. My bad. It won't happen again." And she saw that as being dismissive and wanted an explanation of why and how I messed up, so she would get frustrated with me. It took a lot of work to understand the disconnect in our communication. I might not like how Thor presents himself a lot of the time, but it seems like he has a communication style that a lot of people see as abrasive.
@clareashcraft3411
This scratched my healthy conflict itch. It's such a valuable example of being honest e.g. "The way you're speaking feels dissmissive and rubs me the wrong way," but still being productive and respectful, especially because you could tell Dr. K was being intentional with the words he chose. Challenging someone while maintaining compassion and care (and making sure the other person is seeing that care) is too rare.
@RedWeeb4926
Thanks. This was one of the most deepest, nuanced, perhaps niche in a way, topic about human perception, how other people see you vs how you see you, and online perception, that I have seem being tackled in a video. In a manner that made the guest felt comfortable to unravel and digest a senario with no clear satisfactory answers. I was Scared that this video was going to be a waste of +3 hours invading my late sleep schedule but it was worth it. Just want it to drop this comment for support on this vid. It's a hidden gem amongst all the other very helpful topic you guy make.👍
@J4SU_YT
This is exactly what the internet needs. Conversations about the subleties of perception, tone, interpretations etc. Really going meta over all of it and putting everything on display in a neutral and exploratory way is such an great way of helping people understand these situations.
@seef279
Im being a bit harsh probably, and this is probably the reason im not a clinician, but hearing pirates main take away be something akin to “other people are too emotional but im just so highly logical” is very frustrating
@terr1fyer201
every story pirate tells also comes with an explanation of how you should think about it. like he's not only presenting his own opinion or facts, he's also explaining to you how you should receive what he's saying. that's a very unpleasant way to talk to people
@UnNuclear
2:09:18 This is the most important moment for me and this is why Thor is getting so much hate. My father always told me that when you're apologizing, you don't try to justify it or else it will come off as an excuse or deflection and that you're not really sorry about it. When you apologize it needs to be, "This happened, I messed up, I'm sorry." Thor apologizes like, "This happened, we all messed up, I'm sorry it happened, BUT this happened and this happened." It comes across as disingenuous and fake because he's attempting to excuse and deflect under the guise of context and information. Unfortunately, at this point though, it's too late for a proper apology because everyone will call it out for being fake.
@lukis6220
It's actually mindblowing to me how skilled Dr. K is at his profession. The precision with which he disassembled Thor's account of things and got into the gap between what Thor believes to have happened and the response to it is unreal.
@Jaemae-jl8by
I used to enjoy Pirate’s content, but after the OnlyFangs incident, I stepped away and haven’t watched him since. While watching Dr. K’s discussion, he kept referencing the “missing missing reasons,” which I felt really hit the mark. Pirate’s story was that he was told to “run,” so he did. But there’s missing context here: Pirate had long positioned himself as a “WoW prodigy,” someone who deeply understood the game and his class. He often referenced his knowledge of Blizzard mechanics and built a community around the idea that he was a top-tier player. A player of that caliber should know that “run” doesn’t mean abandon your team — it means coordinate a retreat and try to get out together. In his conversation with Dr. K, Pirate claimed he didn’t want to come off as rude, so he avoided saying certain things. But if you watch the footage, he did say, “What do you mean? You said run, so I ran.” That’s not holding back — that’s making a point. He appeared to gaslight his team. They were clearly asking for his help, and he hovered over his potions and mana gem as if he was deciding whether to intervene — ultimately choosing not to. He then used his mana inefficiently just to appear spent, which seemed disingenuous. When his team called him out, he didn’t just defend himself — he was smug and even vindictive, essentially blaming them and rubbing it in that they had to start the leveling process all over. When people started calling him out in chat, he responded by banning them. One thing viewers hate is having their voice suppressed. If he had just acknowledged his mistake, let people vent a little, and moved on, things probably would’ve calmed down. But by constantly censoring criticism, he only made the situation worse. I don’t think the harassment or hate he’s received is justified — no one deserves that. But when people feel there’s no accountability, and their voices are silenced, things can escalate quickly, especially online where reactions can be raw and unforgiving.
@AlexJ1
Okay this was a FANTASTIC watch. Dr K modelled some incredibly deft tightrope walking - because getting someone to self-reflect WITHOUT making them defensive is so hard. Especially if they've been traumatized - which Thor clearly has. But that's why Dr K zooming in on Day 1, not Day 100 was so smart. Because it meant he could frame the conversation NOT around the fact that people are trying to take Thor down a peg, but instead around WHY they feel inclined to do so. The objective vs subjective frame was spot on in that regard. Because Thor is blessed/cursed with a naturally authoritative voice, and it's amplified by the fact that his sentence constructions are very declarative. So, if you agree with what he says, it creates a feeling of affirmation. But if you don't, it creates a feeling of someone powerful trying to invalidate you. This is something he has to be mindful of going forward - because he doesn't seem fully aware of his power level. And he's picked a profession that requires him to wield it carefully. Dr K gave him some tough pills to swallow but hey, that's what genuinely helping people often requires.
@sonicsack
I like that you are talking to these "controversial" streamers, like you said in your Amouranth video, you are not here to tell right from wrong or good or bad, but to understand. I think there is good learning to be done when our community approaches these deemed "irredeemable" or "untouchable" streamers and i think a lot of the time these people feel alienated from the rest in some sort of way, and that makes them not change their way
@weebleman6
Speaking as someone who was only aware of him from when he blew up on shorts for a bit.. in a hyperbolic way, he presented himself as someone who can see the fabric of reality and explain practically anything. So for folks piling on to mess with him, I imagine there is some satisfaction felt in watching him be completely unable to figure this one out. Edit: welp, got to the end and yep, K got there
@HealthyGamerGG