My parents got divorced when I was in my middle school. The letters in the talk sound so familiar that when I was little, my dad and mom would tell me totally different versions of the same story, and their words confused me for many years. When I grow up, I realized that it's not about right or wrong. It's just people can only understand the world from their own perspectives, which are usually narrow. And my solution is to honestly express yourself to others, exchange your feelings, your views, or your emotions with your partner, so you can understand each other better. It is so important and useful. Hope everyone can live a happy life instead of being trapped like my parents many years ago
Just finished her book, "Maybe You Should Talk to Someone". It's, literally, the most 'AHA!" book I've ever read. The stories of her going through therapy and those of several clients lives are SO engrossing. I had to see who this woman is!
We talk so much in our culture about getting to know ourselves, but part of getting to know yourself is to unknow yourself – to let go of the one version of the story you've been telling yourself, so that you can live your life and not the story that you've been telling yourself about your life. And that's how we walk around those bars
My wife left me 3 months ago and I lost my job, home and my dog. I've never been happier finding myself. But I do miss my dog. Good luck to everyone out there
This is mind blowing. One of the BEST talks and such a powerful message. In one of my classes at University, our professor asked us " What would you like the people at your funeral to say about you". Quite a few people said " Oh I would like them to say he/she was a great husband / wife, friend etc etc". Then one guy stood up and said" I would like them to say "Look he is still breathing"!!
This is a masterpiece of a Ted Talk. Easy to understand, short, concise and the prison bar analogy, perfect.
I just finished reading her book “Maybe You Should Talk To Someone”. I absolutely loved it and it really opened my mind. Thank you so much, Lori.
Excellent TED talk. Change your narrative. If you think you don't deserve more, you will always settle for the lesser versions of choices, things, people, jobs, etc. Such a process!
This is very powerful. Editing how you perceive the world and reshaping your responses can lead to deep and powerful changes. I’ve seen it. I’ve experienced it. An excellent TED talk!
"If the Queen had balls, she'd be a King!" What a great line! And, I couldn't agree more regarding the change; yes, we all want change but change of other character in our story. That's most of us!
Girl... I almost threw my phone this was so good. My good points and takeaways " Which stories to listen to and which ones need to be edited" " I want to change but they are really saying is that they want another character in the story to change" Word of the Day " Ultracrepidarianism- the habit of giving opinions and advice on matters outside of one's knowledge or competence" Girl I know that's right "We must to responsibility for our role in the story" All great key points thank you so much
It takes some skills to make people laugh, think, and inspire them in a short 15-minute talk! I'm a transformation coach, I know how powerful rewriting your life script can be. When you rewrite your story your life will change, and soon you'll see a shift in the dynamics of your friendships, too. I agree with Lori, it can be scary, even if the changes are positive.
As a lifelong sufferer of PTSD from an early childhood event...I just paused at 7:33 (with tears) because casting off old misperceptions of rejection is like another rejection in and of itself. I have indeed been editing my story for several years now. I know what I want my story to be. You have just given me a window into a future that I can actually get to. No. More like an open door. Thanks.
This lecture should be shown everywhere. It's the most incredible advice I have ever heard!
Wise woman! This is the best TED Talk I've listened! Clear and precise. Thank u so much.
I just finished reading her book " maybe you should talk to someone" and i want to thank you for this masterpiece, it made me laugh, cry, think and most importantly understand that happiness but also sadness are both temporary.
"The next time you're struggling with something. Remember that we're all going to die .And then pull out your editing tools and ask yourself : what do i want my story to be ? And then go write your masterpiece . " Lori Gottlieb
I am so proud of myself for changing my life. I was into alcohol and drugs really bad and they destroyed my life and I suffered the consequences. I seen how badly I hurt others and wanted to live a better life and become a better person. I went through rehab and got a really good support system who helped me in my recovery not just from addiction but everything and therapy helps. I have the desire to understand people, have compassion, forgive them and want better for them and to bless others because of how badly I was treated. I have let go of abusive relationships because I realized I didn't deserve to be treated bad because I'm a good person I have good people in my life who treat me good. I've got resources to solve my problems, make good out of the bad things, and to live a good life and I'm so grateful.
The key is being truthful and honest about oneself.
@happynaturalist1793