Crazy Laws that Still Exist in the UK

Did you know that in the UK, they have a bunch of weird laws that are still technically written in the law books, but are lowkey not enforced? Here are some of the most outdated and ridiculous laws that still exist in the UK.

Detonating Nukes Is Banned! Atomic blasts aren’t just a bad idea, they’re illegal. In fairness, you’d assume the local constabulary would want a word following any surprise mushroom clouds.

Being Homeless Is Technically Illegal (Blame Napoleon)! Napoleon lost. We won. And the soldiers came home - but many troops had no prospects. Fearing an influx of beggars, vagrancy was banned. That’s sorted, then.

Firing Cannons In Residential Areas! This law prohibits cannon fire within 300 yards of residential properties. Top tip: you’ll need to pace out 301 yards and place your cannon accordingly. Just to be safe.

Leaving Your Car On A Pavement! This one makes no sense. Parking on the pavement outside London isn’t illegal but driving on the pavement is. Perhaps tow a handy crane and park where you like.

You Can’t Be Drunk In A Pub! Yeah. Bummer. Looks like we’re all limited to a swift half, then? What’s more, since 2003, bar staff cannot legally serve drunk people. Time to practice your sober face.

Asking A Friend For Small Change Isn’t Advised! The shrapnel in our pockets always falls just short at the pay and display machine, doesn’t it? But asking a friend for the extra cash is deemed illegal begging. Wow.

Beat It! No, Wait, Actually, Better Not! Dusty rugs must not be beaten in the street. Smog from Victorian factory pollution is fine. But no dusty rugs, please. It’ll give your neighbour a tickly throat.

Don’t Chat To The Postal Service For Too Long! Most people know you can’t open someone else’s mail. You also may not delay the mail. Perhaps save your inane morning chit-chat for the message group or your cat..

Deer Oh Deer, That’s The Death Penalty! King George III (the “Mad King” who lost America - or the King in Bridgerton) had few marbles to lose.

Dog Walkers Must Carry An Empty Poo Bag At All Times! Your dog’s poorly stomach could cost you a fortune. £100 fines are in place if you cannot produce spare - empty - poo bags when challenged. Easier to carry a cork.

It’s illegal to enter the House of Parliaments wearing a suit of armor! A 1313 Statute Forbidding Bearing of Armour, forbids members of Parliament from entering the House while wearing armor.

It’s treason to misplace a postage stamp! Placing a postage stamp bearing the monarch’s head upside down on an envelope is considered an act of treason.

It is illegal to gamble in a library! The Library Offenses Act of 1898 makes it illegal to gamble in a library.

It’s illegal to handle salmon in suspicious circumstances! This is a recent law, which is even more absurd. But under the Salmon Act of 1986, it is an offence to receive or dispose of salmon under suspicious circumstances.

Importing Polish Potatoes! Thanks to the aptly named, but bizarre Polish Potatoes Order of 2004, it is actually illegal to import or bring over any potatoes from Poland. We’re not sure exactly why this law was put into place but it seems po-tally crazy to us.

In Scotland Strangers Are Welcome to Use Your Toilet! Did you know that if a stranger knocks on your door and asks to use your toilet, you are legally obliged to let them?

Flying a Kite May Not Be the Best Idea! An odd British law claims that “who shall fly any kite or play at any game to the annoyance of the inhabitants or passengers

You Should Not or Indecent Ballads! We know how catchy the new Kanye West or Jay-Z’s tunes could be, but we strongly recommend you to fight your urges to sing along. According to the Metropolitan Police Act of 1839